Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Keep On Moving
Sunday night I took a Tizanidine because I felt spasticity creeping in my legs. I felt the tightness and pain from my calves down to my ankles. I was grateful it waited until after my weekend ended before it started.
When I was given Tizanidine to take for spasticity, it was prescribed take one tablet every three hours. I did just that in the beginning, but I did not see the need to continue taking it once I was no longer experiencing spasticity in my body. Tizanidine was put in my take as needed category because it did the job after a day. Well, I was so lucky this time around, when I woke the next day, I did not feel the tightness and pain while I was lying in bed.
The minute I stood up and tried to walk my legs felt like concrete, every step was painful and my balance was shaky. I had no choice but to painfully make my way to the monstrous looking four-prong cane because I need assistance to keep from falling. I hated it when my doctor ordered me a four-prong cane and I was determined not to ever use it.
I thought to myself, “God, please don’t do this to me now after I had such a beautiful weekend and I have been feeling better since I have not been injecting myself with Copaxone”. It is funny how quick the mind thinks the worst and how easy it is to start feeling depressed when your way of life is threaten. I pushed the negative thoughts out of my mind and replaced them with positive ones. I put a plan of action together. First, I had to get rid of my vanity and accept the fact I need the help of my cane for now. I used my cane as I moved about my house and stayed off my legs as much as possible. Monday I completely rest in bed all day.
I decided not to pump myself with Tizanidine after taking it for a day and I refused to take Lortab 10mg to combat the breakthrough pain I was feeling from the spasticity. The morphine I have going into my body 24/7 is enough and I am trying to breakaway from taking Lortab whenever I have breakthrough pain. My goal is not to become heavily dependent on medication, I been there and done that. Since I have been on Duragesic patches, I noticed many of the daily symptoms I use to feel from MS are far between. I dwindled myself down from the many prescription drugs I am prescribed and my goal is to continue the Duragesic patch and a treatment to slow the progression of MS...Tysabri. I prefer to keep the other prescribed drugs as needed and my hope is I will not need them often.
My legs are feeling better and I do not need the aid of my cane, I credit rest, not allowing myself to become depress over my concrete legs, and accepting the reality my life is subject to change. For now I can keep on moving! I realize it is how I approach the changes when they occur because for now the changes are temporary when they happen. If a permanent change eventually happen I will deal with it when the time come.