Saturday, February 7, 2009
Living With MS....MY WAY
I thought I was going to get myself together when I wrote “MS you can’t keep a good person down” and “Honey you are a Junkie” in June 2007. All I did was trade in the numerous prescription I was taking daily and as needed for a more dangerous and potent drug. My reflection was the best thing to happen to me in 2008.
I still live with pain, tingling, numbness, fatigue, nausea, dizziness, and insomnia. Hell, living with MS I never knew which ailment was going to afflict me, or when it was going to happen. I still do not know today because MS is a predator that I cannot control, but I can control how I allow it to affect my life.
Too many times, I allowed MS to put me in a depress state, for too long I taken drugs regularly to keep symptoms away. Allowing MS to dictate my mood and what I put in my body is what will cause my DEATH. The aforementioned is my reality of living with MS.
I realized if I could live through withdraw symptoms of Fentanyl, I can live with pain, tingling, numbness, fatigue, nausea, dizziness, and insomnia without popping a pill or capsule everyday to keep the symptoms away. I am no idiot; I will take medication, as I need it. I am proud of myself because I have been strong enough not reach for a pill or capsule when MS take me for a ride with one or more of my symptoms. I am proud of the fact I need to have new prescriptions written for the MS symptoms that plagues me when I go see me Neurologist February 17…yes, it has been that long since I taken what I call my as needed drugs.
I have come a long way, the only drugs, I take on a daily basis are my Copaxone injection and Cymbalta. I would not be taking Cymbalta if I had a severe case of anxiety recently. My anxiety is better and I contribute that to Cymbalta, therefore, I will continue taking my Cymbalta on a daily basis. I never want to experience the type of anxiety I just overcame in my life.
Living with MS my way may not work for others, but damn sure works for me.